11 Ways to Make Your Life Harder

I’m ending this week of featuring brilliant party ideas from Real Simple with their article called 11 Ways to Straighten Up After a Party. I thought they’d have clever ideas on how to make party clean-up, simpler. And they do have a couple but they lead off with a killer one:

Freeze cubes of leftover wine and save them for recipes that call for vino, like Slow-Cooker Red Wine Short Ribs. Or consolidate half-consumed bottles to make a boozy syrup that you can drizzle over waffles, ice cream, pound cake, ricotta, or fruit.

My Classic Freedom (SFJ) get ‘er done suggestion? Put a cork in it and drink the rest tomorrow night. OR wash it down the sink. Unless I’m serving $50+ plus bottles of wine, it’s not that much money down the drain. But, I could see other types, say a Fun (SP) who loved to cook, doing the syrup thing. As for me, it’s midnight and I want to be in bed ASAP after a party. I know half of the Organics (NF) and Smarts (NT) out there would just go to bed if it’s super late — unless they’re married to a Classic (SJ) that is.

Water Rings

Next up is water rings on your table or a piece of wood furniture.

Try rubbing a bit of nongel toothpaste onto a water ring, then buff with a clean cloth. Or substitute full-fat mayonnaise for the toothpaste; leave it on for at least an hour before wiping clean and buffing.

The toothpaste suggestion has disaster written all over it because some non-detail oriented types are going to ignore their “nongel” adjective and put any old toothpaste on there — that means Organics (NF) and Smarts (NT) — and truly ruin the table. But, the full-fat mayonnaise seems like it would have universal appeal. Although, I could again see a non-detail orient personality type trying a light mayo on the table. I think the point is the fat.

Flat Club Soda

This next one is good for Classics, Funs, and maybe a some Organic Structures (NFJ) who garden:

Use flat club soda to hydrate houseplants. It usually contains a phosphate, which promotes growth and root development, says Deb Donaldson, a blue-ribbon winner at the Philadelphia Flower Show.

Just remember to put it with your gardening supplies or you’re more likely to forget about it.

Leftover Bread

Slice into cubes and prepare a [traditional] panzanella

I got these party tips around the winter holiday time so I substituted a more summery panzanella recipe than Real Simple had suggested. I don’t know about you but I rarely have that much left over bread at a party but perhaps I just serve yummier bread than most or none of my friends are afraid of carbohydrates.

Cheese

Thicken soups with melted leftovers; or, better yet, consolidate rinds and ends to create Cheese-End Fondue.

I mean in the summertime, you just throw them out, right? How often is one going to make Fondue in the summer. But, also I’m not frequently making homemade soups. This tip is clearly for Funs who love to cook, maybe a few Classics and Organics (NF). But, I put money down that there’s perhaps 0.5% of the population who ends up using most of their leftover cheese that they painstakingly save from a party.

Coffee Grounds

This next one had me crying. Seriously, if you can’t throw out coffee grounds without feeling guilty then it’s not a personality trait but rather perhaps something in need of a Xanax. Who in the WORLD has time to do this type of thing??? They must make-up 0.1% of the population.

Create an exfoliating body scrub, says Kayla Fioravanti, owner of Von Natur, a line of natural skin-care products. Topical caffeine also temporarily widens the blood vessels, which improves circulation.

Mix 2 tablespoons of wet grounds, 1 tablespoon of fine salt, and 2 tablespoons of olive oil, then massage the mixture onto the skin in a circular motion.

Sore Feet

Unlike the coffee grounds suggestion, THIS tip seeme super easy and a great idea if you don’t have time for a bath to relax.

Try a rejuvenating ginger foot bath. Simmer 1 tablespoon of dried ginger in 4 cups of water for 20 minutes. Cool, then soak feet in it for 10 to 15 minutes.

Hangover

Eat an egg sandwich on white bread. Experts believe cysteine, an amino acid in eggs, helps break down acetaldehyde, a toxin produced when alcohol is in the liver, which can contribute to a hangover, says Rachel Vreeman, M.D., a coauthor of Don’t Swallow Your Gum (St. Martin’s, $14, amazon.com). Your body turns refined carbs into energy, hence the white bread.

Now I know why eggs are so delicious after a long night out on the town! Obviously this is a universally brilliant suggestion.

I left off the the winter holiday party clean-up suggestions such as using candy canes as drink stirrers or breaking them up for future cookie baking projects and then actual ideas of what to do with fallen tree needs outside of the obvious putting them in the trash. The ideas were out of season and seemed purely designed to make your life more difficult. But I must give an honorable mention for their tip on wrapping paper & ribbons. They actually suggest saving tissue and wrapping paper to separate clothes in your suitcase or wrap around a votive candle for “instant mood lighting” — more like fire hazard. Anyway, Classics, Organics and Funs, don’t get any crazy ideas from this — wrapping paper is almost always trash and only fabric ribbons are worth saving.