Organic Luvvahs

Before I delved into seeing what relationship advice there was for Organics (NFs), I wondered if two Organics married to each other have fights? Organics prize harmony almost above all else so would it just be all bon bons, cotton candy and pleasantries in this match-up? Since rainbows and unicorns don’t actually exist, the question is rhetorical. But, as with Classic Freedoms (SFJs) it’s often the act of avoiding disagreements that causes problems. Airing disagreements in a respectful way can often lead to greater harmony. 

Organic Freedoms (NFPs):

“16 Ways to Love Your Lover” by Otto Kroeger and Janet M. Thuesen tells Extroverts (ENFPs) to face today’s problems. Essentially it’s the same advise that they give to Extroverted Organic Structures (NFJs) — see below — which is to allow disagreement. Often Extroverted Organic Freedoms escape conflict by going into an imaginary world or a future world but this doesn’t make the conflict disappear. Try facing the problems that face you in the present tense and you just might find your imaginary or future world is a reality that much quicker! As for Introverts (INFPs), try offering advice more often to people because you really understand other people’s feelings very well. You can sell yourself short in this area and people really could benefit from your insight, especially your significant other. But as with Extroverted Organic Freedoms, the rationale for not sharing is not wanting to ruffle feathers — ahem, euphemism for causing disagreement. So, go ahead and give someone your two cents — more often than not it’ll be well received.

Organic Structures (NFJs):

Introverts (INFJs) need to remember to show just how well they understand their loved one’s feelings. The implication is that Introverted Organic Structures are too structured with when they offer a pat on the back or an “I Love You” I must say that either I have a very evolved INFJ mother or this advice doesn’t pertain to all INFJs. She’s always been great at giving me a pat or a hug when I needed one. But, if you find yourself surprised to learn that a loved one doesn’t think you understand their feelings, perhaps Kroeger & Thuesen are on to something and you just need to remember to demonstrate your keen ability to sympathize. And last but not least, Extroverted Organic Freedoms (ENFJs) need to remember to allow for disagreement. You might have a habit of over personalizing conflicts and getting hurt. Try to allow your partner a little room to disagree with you without taking it personally.