Tomaytoes, Tomahtows — There Is a Difference…
You Say Tomato, I Say Shut Up, by Annabelle Gurwitch and Jeff Kahn is a voyeuristic look into a very similar and messy household to my own. And yes, from this book I deduced that Annabelle Gurwitch is a Smart Freedom and Jeff Kahn is an Organic Freedom. How do I glean this? The repeated references to Annabelle being unsentimental and Jeff being a corny romantic and the fact that they have one helluva messy house. I can relate.
Now Annabelle might be a Smart Structure. She is the one who takes charge, tries to impose structure on her household, and has lots of balls in the air, but the way she just gives into the chaos of her house sounds so much like me, that I just think she’s a Smart Freedom trying to flex her structure as the woman of the house, (It’s always relegated to us, regardless of type) trying to make things run smoothly and it’s just impossible when you’re dealing with an Organic Freedom and you’re not that clean yourself.
“Jeff (’s) interest in ancient civilizations seems to have degenerated into a compulsion to create piles. These mounds of detritus act as a Rosetta stone to the life of Jeff Kahn. Receipts, phone numbers, tax-filing information, price tags from new clothes, movie theater stubs can be found in interesting configurations scattered onto every flat surface in the house.”
Anyone married to an Organic or Smart of both kinds can relate to this complaint. And the only thing you can do if you are not an Organic or Smart? Try to relegate these piles all to ONE ROOM. Annabelle, for instance, keeps her mess in her car. And if your spouse is the messy one but refuses to cooperate, you could always withhold sex (although I’m guessing a zillion marriage therapists would tell you “bad idea”.)