Vanish Red Wine Stains

My friend Elizabeth (a Smart) swears by pouring boiling water repeatedly over offending red wine stains. And when SHE does it, it works. When I do it? Not so much. And unfortunately, I can’t store her in my closet and whip her out when someone spills a little red. My secret? Soaking the red wine stain in white wine.

I learned this tip from a Brit that I dated in my early twenties. During a trip to visit him on my last night in London, he accidentally spilled an entire glass of red wine all over a light blue silk shirt of mine. This was after I’d broken up with him so I felt there was a certain Karmic retribution in it. But, he actually saved the day (and the shirt).

We soaked the offending shirt in white wine overnight and then I packed the wine soaked blouse in a plastic bag in my suitcase and travelled on my Virgin Atlantic flight back to NYC — every time I fly Virgin I think, “Why isn’t every airline like this?” — and enjoyed more wine. When I got back to the city, I took the shirt in to be dry cleaned and voila, no stain.

So, on to the how to … I’m going to do it like eHow — where I got today’s photo from — writes their “how to’s” (plus making lists is also my natural instinct as a Classic)

1. As with any stain, blot, blot, blot. Don’t rub (my husband always rubs). B L O T.

2. Liberally soak with white wine.

3. Let sit for a while. I know this will frustrate Funs and Classics looking for precise minutes but sometimes you need to trust your gut and your eyes.

4. Repeat soak if necessary.

5. Dry clean shirt/article of clothing or for rugs/upholstery use your then regular cleaning method for them.

The following is a Cautionary tale for Classics like me: Don’t go saving bottles of white wine for “just in case” moments. I did this because I once found myself with a red wine stain and had no white wine on hand. As a result, I started to hold on to unfinished bottles of white “just in case” (nothing scars a Classic into hoarding more than not having something on hand in a pinch)  I’ve stopped this habit because of what happened when my mom, an Organic Structure, came for a visit.

It never crossed her mind that I’d keep more than one bottle of white wine for cleaning purposes in my fridge — a valid assumption. I didn’t realize she was drinking my 2 month old half drunk bottle of cheap white wine that I was saving for just in case I get a red wine stain until she was onto her 2nd glass. Personally, I was a little frightened that she didn’t notice how bad it was, but since I have been told I have a barbarian’s palate, I really shouldn’t tease. (Last time Katie watched Kelly and Mom share a bottle of wine, MOM is the one who had the cojones to send back a bottle which was clearly bad, whereas Kelly would have kept on drinking like a good barbaric Celt.)

Originally published on March 9, 2011.